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Approximately 40-50% of first marriages end in divorce. While getting married is one of the most significant commitments in most people’s lives, the increasing divorce rates paint a bleak picture. However, marriage isn’t as simple as planning a wedding and living happily ever after. Before tying the knot, it’s critical to discuss certain key elements with your partner to ensure a happy and healthy marriage. With that said, here are some key topics to agree on before marriage.
One of the most common reasons for marital conflict is money. Some surveys show that 35% of people blame their fiancees for the troubles they have in their marriages. And that's why you should discuss your financial situation ( income, debt, savings, etc.) with your partner before getting married. Discuss how you plan to manage your finances as a couple, including whether you will have joint accounts or keep separate accounts. Be honest and transparent about your spending habits and financial goals. Set realistic expectations about your lifestyle and financial responsibilities, such as paying rent, bills, and taxes.
Because many people put up a mental block about the possibility of separation, they avoid bringing it up. But it's important to know what you must do if things don't work out, including child custody, will, prenup, finances, etc. Drawing up a will or establishing a prenup can make a life-changing difference in a devastating scenario. Plus, prenuptial agreements no longer carry the same taboo as before, and they can offer important protections, particularly if one or both of you has many assets. It's also helpful if former spouses or kids from previous relationships are in the picture. You can always speak with a family lawyer for guidance.
It's crucial to discuss your family values before getting married. How important is family to you? What role do you see your parents and extended family playing in your life as a couple? Discuss how you plan to handle family obligations and relationships, including holidays, birthdays, and other celebrations. Make sure that your partner shares your values and expectations about family. Before getting married, you should also discuss your long-term goals and aspirations. What are your career ambitions? Do you want to have children, and if so, when? Where do you see yourself living in the future? It's important to ensure that your partner's plans and goals align with yours so that you can work together towards a common future.
Communication is the key to a successful marriage. It would be best if you discussed how you communicate with each other, including how you express your feelings and resolve conflicts. Discuss your communication styles and preferences, and work together to establish healthy communication habits. Be open and honest with each other, and ensure you both feel heard and understood.
Physical intimacy is an essential part of a healthy marriage. Before getting married, discuss your expectations and preferences regarding getting intimate. Also, communicate your history, desires, and boundaries to ensure you feel comfortable and respected in the bedroom. Don't ignore how you plan to prioritize intimacy in your relationship and make time for each other.